Let's Talk Halloween!

It's October already! Only so much time to get your costumes made!

Those of you who know me on FanSci or Facebook know my sister has chosen Lady Loki, (from annagiovannini at deviant art). She's bought some fabric and this weekend we'll be starting to cut it up and hope the shape it takes will look...
.....something

.....like

<--this.

Don't worry, I'll post pictures later to show either our triumph or our humiliating failure.... I wonder if we should get a wig or if Christina will just be a short-haired Loki. Probably that second one. I'll get out the hair-wax so she can spike it up for interest.

My idea (which I also bought fabric for, so is now etched as close to in stone as I get) is a gender-swapped Thor costume to go with her Lady Loki. And Lacking interest in armor, I think I might go even a little further away from the traditional.

I've been sketching. Scanned in pencil doesn't show as well as I'd like, and I'm not used to trying to put my own art online so I'm a bit lost in digitally fixing it, but I'm sure you get the idea.

I'm leaning toward the last one -- the one with the under-bust vest -- I found a light silvery gray knit to make the undershirt with that should give just a hint of armor. The vest and skirt will be a darker, heavier knit that won't be completely stiff, but should hold it's shape enough to flare nicely past the hips.

The top hat worries me a little too. I've started 3 different ones, but have yet to finish any. And I'm not sure how to make the wings yet.

What are you planning? Making anything big and difficult or will you be buying stuff from the store, like I probably will for my children who have decided to be Harry Potter and Hermione.

This is not a gun control issue.

Aurora.

I found out about it later than others because I spent a few days off the medias this week, so when I found out about I'm hearing more reactions to the even than actual  news. If you've also spent time away from news, the issue is that some batshit crazy dude walked into a theater and killed people. That's it.

The reactions I've seen.... If those people were carrying this would have turned out different, says some jackass full of bravado, without thinking that only someone trained in how to react in that situation had any chance of protecting themselves; without thinking how badly this is belittling the tragedy that happened here.

Let's think about this idea for a second. If people are carrying they could defend themselves. If people only started to feel like this was the Old West, like they were in danger every minute of their lives and had to carry a weapon just to survive, then they could have defended themselves. Because if carrying could save you, you only have yourself to blame if you don't have the gun when needed, right? That means it's your fault if something bad happens because you hadn't prepared.

This is not a sane way to live.

And even if they WERE carrying, even if it was the Old West mentality, go look up how many police officers (with more training than most average citizens, I would hope) freeze the first time they actually have to shoot a person. Go look up how many bullets actually hit the target when the target breathes and how many hit the surrounding landscape (or in this case, hit people in other rooms).

This is not a solution and it's ridiculous to pretend that it is.

On the other hand, since said gunman had legally purchased the several (yes, several) guns he used in the attack, people are already arguing for stricter gun control laws using this as an excuse. If only we, as a society, had passed stricter regulations, this wouldn't have happened. Once more belittling the tragedy of a batshit crazy dude walking into a theater and killing people. Here we're calling it a learning experience. See what happens when you don't do what mommy and daddy say? You get hurt.

As if guns are necessary when people decide they want to kill others. As if they can prove he wouldn't have chosen another method if guns weren't easily available. As if planes are actually safer now that I can't carry a pair of scissors to go with my knitting.

There are times in life when you can say, 'this fucking sucks.' Where we don't try to point a finger here or there or use it to further our own political agenda.

This sucks.

That man was batshit insane and there is no excuse for what he did.

The police were there in 90 seconds. They kicked ass! I didn't see anything in the news about people trampling each other trying to get away. This is a big wrong thing that happened. It cannot be fixed, can only be lived with. We can offer medical assistance and trauma counseling to the survivors. We can help after the fact, but pointing fingers is not helping. Saying that our gun control laws are not good enough is not helping.

This was a crazy man doing a bad thing. Help or get out of the way.

I Sent Grimm Away

We spent $5000 on Grimm's emergency medical bills in his first year, most of it on a credit card because we suck at saving, so we're still paying for them. Then Husband made me talk about how much more we could pay (which was not much since the car decided to have a broken engine mount and take up all the rest of our plastic money.) He comes up with the eminently practical solution where the next emergency is Grimm's last.

If that seems harsh, his last emergency consisted of him screaming in pain (I never knew a dog could scream before that) and several thousand dollars in tests that found nothing. We still don't know what caused it. The next step was a neurologist, but then he got better.

Because we never figured out what caused it, we could also never figure out what solved it and I began to live in fear of it happening again. Because Husband makes sense. We cannot lose our house on a chance of not making him better, but of possibly figuring out what's wrong.

But that last solution was so horrible to me that I was struggling for other possibilities. Generous donors paying for doggie medical tests? (we didn't qualify) The Animal Hospital Credit Card we did qualify for? (No, if I could afford more payments, my current card wouldn't be maxed out.) A new home with people who weren't so far in the hole with medical costs? (Grimm has a good many behavioral issues we work around, so it would be difficult to find someone we could trust and how do advertise a troubled dog in a way people will believe?)

Then I went to a garage sale where this family was selling a python and we started talking about pets and medical expenses and I liked them. We talked for a half hour or more about surprise vet bills and training solutions and rescue dogs and then I found out that French Bulldogs were their dream breed, but they didn't have one. Yet.

And I took their number with the idea that when Grimm got sick again, I had a solution other than that bad one. Then I came home and told Husband about it, and saying it out loud made it feel very selfish. Because somewhere in my head I'd decided to call them when he got sick again.  Not today, tomorrow, or next month, but when the choices were sleepy-time for Grimm or new people.

So, once I realized that, I called them. I told them I fully expected several thousand more in medical costs over the next few years. Not that he's sick now, but after our first year together it doesn't feel safe to depend on him staying that way. We had already talked a little about that at the garage sale, and his behavioral issues as well, so I asked them to come over, meet Grimm and talk about it all again.

They were still thrilled with the idea of taking him home. We talked about the cherry eye, how the vet said no-surgery at first, but now that he lost the other eye how they want to do surgery and how that's a thousand right there. How I'm putting it off because they said the surgery wasn't worth the drawbacks in the beginning and I'm worried that the change is more to line their pockets than to help Grimm, but that they should check with their vet.

We talked about the jumping muscle in his chest -- I don't think I mentioned the screaming in pain part because I was focused on the way to tell if it's the same thing and what we think might have helped. (He could scream in pain for other reasons and that's a whole new set of diagnostic tests). We talked about the heart murmur and the vets we've been to see and our time at the Small Animal Hospital (the teaching vet school where they can do the big stuff like eye surgeries or cancer treatments for dogs.) We talked about the expensive dog food for his sensitive stomach.

So now he's staying with a new family who are not several thousand in debt or terrified each day will bring a new condition.

It all sounds like a good decision. A practical useful decision.

But it doesn't feel like one.

I can't seem to stop crying and I want to go over there right now and bring him back. But that won't solve the problem (If he can't acclimate, he'll come home no matter what and we'll keep him for as long as he has) so for now, here are the old posts about Grimm to help exacerbate my crying binges.

Brand New Grimm
His Eye Issue (and other frustration-fueled thoughts)
All the Dogs
Both One-Eyes
Top Hat
And this one.

I think this might have been my worst idea ever.

Except for Grimm, maybe. Maybe he's doing better than me.

I hope he's doing better than me.

The Three Day Weekend of the Three Books

I started reading two books on Saturday; The Warded Man (Peter V. Brett) and Poison Sleep (Tim Pratt). I started with The Warded Man and moved to the other one when I lost the first one in the kitchen. Sometimes books travel with me and I forget where I put them. It didn't take me too long to find it, but by then I was interested in the other book.

I finished Poison Sleep late Saturday night, not because I HAD to finish it, but because I couldn't sleep and it was there. It was an interesting enough book and I plan to hunt down the other stories in the series.

The Warded Man was my Sunday book, but it switched point of view characters after a few chapters, so it was easy to leave behind. I'm still struggling to carry on past the next character switch. The three characters will probably end up in the same place eventually and move into one story, but now, with every new character it's like starting over.

Really, the only reason I made it past the first point of view change was a review on Goodreads. Paul Stotts, in his review, said:

Most would fight for their family no matter the odds. Some wouldn’t, too controlled by their cowardice. Too cowed by their fear of death. But what if you didn’t fight. 

And your child saw. 

Saw their parent revealed as a coward, their respect for you disappearing instantly like a magic trick. Poof! Their hero tumbling from a pedestal. 

What would that do to the child? What would that make them?

That caught my attention. Much more than the generic blurb on the back of the book, so I keep trying. The other reviewers keep saying the second book is better, so I'll probably eventually get through this one, even if I let myself get distracted several more times before I get there.

This morning, I sat down in my morning tea spot (next to which I keep a small pile of ToBeRead books, even though The Warded Man has moved to another reading spot) and picked up Tess Garritsen's Vanish. It took me to the beginning of the second chapter to realize it was what Rizzoli and Isles was based on. Maybe I knew that when I picked the book up from where ever I found it, but when I start a book, I don't read the back blurb until I'm trying to decide whether I'm giving up or not -- or unless I'm looking for clues on something surprising, like the characters having the same name as those on a TNT show I watched.

So, some time later I realize I've been wandering from room to room this morning -- I have things I need to do other than reading -- and I notice that where ever I go, it seems that this book is next to me. It's caught me more than the other two did and it's not even my genre. And it started with a rape scene that nearly had me putting it down. I think it's because the stakes are big and made obvious in the beginning.

Poison Sleep started with the escape of a dangerous mental patient, but she's captured in that first chapter and the day goes on switching us into normal day stuff. Then it doesn't get scary again for half the book. It depends on the complexities of world to keep me reading.

The Warded Man has constant danger but, in a world very different than ours, it's every day stuff. Nothing more than they'd face on any other day. It's turning point time for them, but the turning point happens after the scary stuff then it's nothing but recovery and every day activities. And -- I can't stress this enough -- the main character keeps changing. The positive reviews are the big thing keeping me reading.

Vanish has an intro with the super-bad things that almost make me throw it away. Then an interesting character gets a puzzle and we start another interesting character on a somewhat scary path where we KNOW they'll meet the first character, to whom all the bad stuff has happened. And I want that first character to be saved, but it doesn't sound possible right now.

So I'm stopping to scribble these thoughts down and to do my usual Monday vegetable sorting, but I can't imagine going to bed tonight without finishing this book. That's the big thing to figure out. So now, if you'll excuse me, I need to go read until something else Must Be Done.

Instant Yoga

You guys know I'm addicted to Netflix Instant, right?

Well, you can get workout videos there too! I know! What will they think of next?

I thought I'd try Yoga.

I did not realize how much Husband would pick on me.

Just because I quickly get bored with breathing. Seriously, more than one minute of breathing is filler. Just make the workout shorter. I won't mind, I promise. (I know, Conscious Breathing. But that's why it's autonomic; if I had to pay attention to it I'd have stopped long ago and you guys would miss me. You know you would.)

Just because I'd made myself a cup of coffee to sip when there were breaks, or when I got bored. He has this theory coffee and yoga don't go together, pointing out the word 'relaxation' in the title. I say that people relax in different ways, and why the hell are we still breathing? Can't we do something else while we breathe? It's not like chewing gum and walking, I know I could do this!

Anyway, I'm not sure Yoga is the workout plan for me, no matter what kinds of flexibility they promise.